Short update

I am doing well. Still maintaining the same weight on the scale but it has not got me down. I am still working out often and staying on track with WW points. I recently switched from doing both WW and MFP to just MFP, but it seems ever since I made that change I was not staying on track as much and I was eating unhealthier foods. I have decided to go back to doing both WW and MFP like I was when I started this whole thing. This week has been insane for me working full time and recently picking up a per diem job that I have began training. I am working 12hr days and my new job is about a 20-25 minute commute from my house.

I just wanted to check in and let folks know I am still doing well,  just very busy. I will be sure to write again soon, If I can ever find the time! LoL.

View from one of my new office buildings!!

My commute is North and boy is fall making it's apperance!
 

Thanks for reading and have a good day.

Doing good

Ah doing great.

Yesterday I did my walk/jog outside in some beautiful neighborhoods and dreamed about my future. I completed 60 minutes and burned 397 calories (my goal was to burn 400 calories) so I was happy.

I have recently picked up a second job and I just got the okay to start training next Friday. I am very excited because it is a per diem situation and I will be able to make my own schedule each month. I never thought I would take a per diem job but this one is with a great company and it is an excellent way to get my foot in the door. The only down fall is it is a 25 minute drive from my house. Most people are probably like “please 25 minutes that is nothing”   but my current dirve to work is 7 minutes and that is with red lights LoL. I also have a bit of an anxiety when it comes to driving far distances and/or on high ways.    :-/

It will be good though because this new job is in my field (my current job is far far from it) and once I am all trained and I can make my own schedule I will have all this extra income, which I desperately need.

I am nervous about how jam packed next week is going to be because it will be very difficult to make time for exercise but once I am done this post I am going to try and make a schedule and see where I can fit it in.

This week has been great as far as staying on track. My calories are under by 100-200 each night and I have been trying to burn about 400 during exercise. I peeked at the scale this morning and I am down 1lb from my last official weigh in. I NEED to stay on track this weekend because come weigh-in day (new weigh in day is going to be Sundays) I have to show some progress. I refuse to keep back pedaling. I have not lost anything in what I feel like is a month now.

Yesterdays work out was good and I went to bed with 200 calories left!

I did my cardio mix completing 15 minutes on each cardio machine ultimately burring 418 calories. My only issue is that I was nauseous, almost motion sick, on all the machines. It is so frustrating but I was able to get through and it was not so bad.  I tired focousing on something in the distance that was still (not easy at the gym when everyone is moving around) but the only thing perfect for that was the wall clock and I did not want to watch the time! LoL. I made it through and took it easy and felt good afterwards.

Today it is cool and partly cloudy so I am going to exercise outside today. (I am most likely going to do my C25K work out.) Diner tonight is not going to be the healthiest option (homemade mac and cheese with ham in it) so I want to make sure I do a full hour of exercise and burn around 400 calories again.

I am also meeting my friend this week and she is going to let me use her 5lb weights and return the 3lbs I have been using. So either this weekend or next week my strength training is going to increase. I am excited about that because I defiantly notice my arms having flabby loose skin. My arms have always been big and I am well aware someone my size is going to have A LOT of saggy loose skin, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. I have never been self-conscious about my arms and they have gotten smaller and I thought I had prepared myself for loose skin but now that it is actually here I don’t like it.

It’s all good though I have already started saving for skin surgery. That will be my ultimate present to myself once I am at my goal weight    ;-)   I hope everyone is having a good day!

Not sure if you can notice an arm difference or not
October 2011 vs. August 2012

Thankful

Today I was reminded by a fellow bloggers post why I started this new way of life. I was reminded that I am not alone, these up’s and down’s and uncomfortable feelings are all a part of the processes.  I will have bad days, bad weeks, but I cannot forget how far I have come, how far I still have to go, and how hard I need to keep working. In the end it will all be worth it. It is already worth it.

I was in a funk and not feeling right or motivated this past week, but I think I have my mojo back. I was able to stay on track with my eating yesterday, and I am pumped up and ready for the gym this afternoon.  I have nothing planned this whole week or weekend that would sacrifice my calories and I feel if I can just stay on track for this one full week I will be so happy. I just need to take it small steps at a time. Short goals lead to long term bigger goals. My short term goal is to stay on track this whole week. Starting yesterday ending Sunday. 

I am toying with the idea of doing my cardio mix at the gym this afternoon. I think that would be the best option because it will keep things interesting and make time go by faster.

This is a short post but I thought it was important to be thankful for everyone else out there who writes about their weight loss. It truly does help me and I am glad I stumbled across this community.

Till next time…..

In a funk

Things have been going okay. Last week was an off week. I usually exercise 6 days a week last week I only did 5 days. My eating has been okay. I am trying to stay on track but a few days I blew it with one meal. I have gained 3lbs but I can’t be upset because I know how I gained it. I have just been in a little funk this whole past week. Today is Monday and I usually don’t exercises on Mondays but I feel like today I should. Even if it’s something small like a walk after diner? I don’t know. I have also discovered I am a weakling on Sundays for football (which I suspected would happen come fall) so I have decided that my weigh in days will now be Sundays so on Sundays I don’t have to stress about what I am eating and allow myself to have a relaxing Sunday. I still plan on exercising on Sundays but not on Mondays. So starting today Sundays will be my relax with food day and Monday will be my relax with exercise day. I will try this for a couple weeks and see how it goes.

In good news I was able to run for the full 60 seconds all ten times during my C25K work out yesterday. I am ecstatic but at the same time I knew I could do it ;-) .  I would like to do the training one more time completing the full 60 seconds all ten times before I move to the next stage which I believe is running for 90 seconds walking for 2 minutes.

Not sure when I will be able to do my C25K work out again, it is hard when the high school track is not available because school has started, but I am excited so I will make it happen.

Not too much to report other then I am in a funk. I truly feel I have lost my optimism but I plan on working extremely hard this week on my eating and sticking to my planned workouts.

Maybe I will read some of my old posts to try and boot my motivation.

Have a good Monday everyone!

E-Card

I thought some of you might like this.

The higher the fall the bigger the bounce.

That’s what they say isn’t it? After my dramatic evening Friday night I was able to stay on track with my food on Saturday. I also went to the gym Saturday after work. I did not have the best work out. I did 20 minutes on the crazy machine and 15 minutes on the bike. By the time I had been on the crazy machine for 15 minutes I started getting nauseous and almost like motion sickness (which has happened to me on the elliptical before.)  I decided to move to the bike which was much better. After my work out I just felt blah. I did not feel good at all.

Thankfully Sunday morning the blah feeling went away and I felt just fine. I decided to do my C25K training on the high school track. It was cloudy with a cool breeze….  absolutely beautiful outside.  The boy didn’t want to come with me so I was nervous but I surprised the shit out of myself. The first time it has you run for 60 seconds I was able to do it. The next two times I could not do it for more then 40 seconds. As am I kicking myself in the ass, this woman on the track passes me and I see she is doing a light jog. I thought to myself she actually looks kind of funny but she is still keeping her heart rate up and keeping her pace. So I said screw it I might look funny but I will give it a try. Wouldn’t ya know by just taking it a little bit easy I was able to run the full 60 seconds the remainder of the training. So for the first time ever I was able to jog 8 out of 10 times for a full 60 seconds. Was it easy? No. Did I feel amazing after? Yes. Was I so proud of myself I had the biggest smile a girl could have? Yes! It was so great.

The rest of my Sunday was spent relaxing with the boy watching football. I found a recipe for “skinny mozzarella sticks” and stayed on track with my calories all day.

I have decided to try only using MFP for the next two weeks and see how it works out.

Today was another amazing stepping stone that I did not expect. I have worked at a dealership/ retail store that has cloths that run fairly small and I have always had to buy the men’s sweat shirts because the women’s clothing is just ridiculous. They have “plus size” women’s clothing but even those are smaller and have always been too tight for me. Well today it is cold and I thought I would take a peek at the sweat shirts. I hated all the men’s ones and thought I was doomed. Then for shits and giggles I thought I will check out the women’s. I found two I likes and tried them on. A black one with pink gems and lettering fit me perfectly! I almost started crying in the bathroom. I have NEVER been able to fit into these cloths and now I have a pink and black hoodie!!! Ugh what an amazing feeling after such an emotional Friday night.

 

 

Sorry the mirror is super dirty in our staff bathroom

 

So overall it turned out to be a great weekend. Sundays run and today sweatshirt gave me the confidence I need to keep going. It has proven to me the hard work is paying off and I know if I keep going it will only keep getting better. I always hear people who have lost a lot of weight say how worth it the hard work is, and today I can finally say I know what they are talking about.  J I hope everyone else  had a great weekend and I wish you well on this Monday.

Fell off the wagon

So yesterday morning I wanted to do the C25K training. I have not been doing it the way it is intended, I more so have just been using it once or twice a week to change up my exercise routine.  I woke up not feeling so great and kind of light headed with a head ach. I ate some cereal and let myself wake up a bit and went for the jog/walk. The first 60 seconds of jogging I was able to do it, but every time after that I just couldn’t. My legs felt so heavy and I could not catch my breath. It was very humid outside and I choose to do the jog on Ohio Ave which has two small hills. (I am used to running on a flat track.)

Needless to say it was horrible, I felt horrible, and it really messed with my head. I quit the training with 13 minutes left to go and just walked home.

About 30 minutes after I got home I felt good, I mean I was still able to burn over 200 calories and what I did complete was still better then doing nothing right?

I was on point all day with my eating and was going to a friend’s house to hang out last night and I knew I wanted at least one glass of wine. Before I left I added up my WW points thinking I would be all set because MFP told me I still had tons of calories left. When I did the math I only had 1 WW point left over but MFP told me I had 250 calories left which would have been enough for 1 ½ glasses.

This annoyed me and I think I may be giving WW a rest and just sticking to MFP.  I feel MFP is a little more accurate and doing two programs can get tiresome sometimes.

Anyway between the bad run in the morning and the discrepancy between my food allowance I ended up drinking the entire bottle of wine, as well as multiple handfuls of pretzels, cheese and crackers, and a few chips and salsa. Oh and three beers.  I COMPLETLEY LOST CONTROLL. Once I was drunk I got very upset and I feel like I lost my spark. I have had such a positive attitude since May and I have not had any major setbacks. I know I was on point all day and it was really only a 5hr span of time that I went out of control, but it still brought tears to my eyes (the alcohol may had helped that happen).

I just feel like my head was in the wrong direction yesterday. I found myself having multiple thoughts yesterday about eating like I used to and not caring how many calories it was. I contemplated not exercising from the moment I woke up and started making excuses, which I can honestly say I have not done once since May.

All in all yesterday was a horrible day mentally for me and I am so thankful we all get second chances. I woke up this morning telling myself we all make mistakes. It is not the setbacks that define us, it is what we do after the set back. If you fall down, all that matters is what you do next. Do you stay on the ground and say screw it, or do you get up wipe yourself off and say I am ready to go again. I know my hard work for the past four months is not down the shitter just because of one bad night and I plan on working very hard to get back on track.

I am making a goal to not have any alcohol for a full two weeks. Alcohol is defiantly a problem for me, because once I have a nice buzz on I want to eat everything,  on top of the unnecessary calories I am consuming from the booze I add all those salty fatty snacks on top of it and that’s just bad news  bears.

I wanted to write this post to show I am just as human as everyone else and we all have bad days. I also wanted to write this to hold myself accountable for my actions last night and document my feelings so I can read back on this and know I don’t want to be in this place again.

I am working today so all my food is here and it is all my usual foods. I also plan on doing 30-45 minutes on the crazy machine at the gym.  No cheating tonight and NO DRINKING. Tonight is college football and tomorrow is the first Sunday for the NFL. I am a HUGE football fan and this will be tough, but I think last night really helped smack my ass into shape and I will be able to stay strong this weekend.

Sorry for such a long post but thank you for reading.

Have any of you had a major setback or a horrible day of eating that was unplanned? What did you do, what were your thoughts or feelings when this happened?

I's got's a new bed!!

 DISCLAIMER:  I am not good at writing and my thoughts and flow can sometimes be all over the place so bare with me.

Ally here writing from my new king size bed! The boy and I have been talking about getting a new bed for about 4 months now and Sunday we finally went out and did it. I spent a little bit more then I would have liked but I think I made a good purchase. I guess I will let chya know in the morning.

My scale decided to take a crap so I also bought a new scale on Sunday.  I have lost 2 more pounds this week and I couldn’t be happier. I did my C25K on Saturday after work with the boy and lets just say he needs to come with me all the time! The first time I tried it I could only jog for 30 seconds. With the boy I was able to make it the full 60 seconds 10 out of 13 times. It was awesome.  On Sunday morning I tried my new Jillian Michaels DVD and yes you guessed it……that woman is INSANE. It was a little fast paced for me and the moves are weird, but she repeats them and is good about explaining how to do them. I did like it and I will be doing it again after work tomorrow.

I am still noticing I am not as hungry as much throughout the day and since this is almost two weeks I am going to say for sure its cause my stomach shrunk   J.   I also caved and bought 3 new shirts this weekend because lately I have been swimming in my cloths and could not stand it anymore. I also had to make a hole in my belt.  I know this is all good things and this is what I am aiming for but now that I just bought this bed I really don’t have money for new cloths. Cooler weather is right around the corner though and I am anxious to see how my fall/winter cloths fit me this year.

:::WARNING::: I am about to get mushy.

Before I had my epiphany in May I had a thought. That thought was “maybe I am just meant to be fat, maybe this is the path that was chosen for me, maybe this is how I am supposed to live my whole life…struggling”.  I had told myself last winter if summer comes and I cannot fit into all the cloths I keep saving I am throwing them away. Well April came and I was still too big for my cloths, I had a break down and threw all kinds of shit away. Looking back now I am pissed I did that because those cloths were cute! But I think I needed to do that, I think reaching that point was my bottom and it helped me turn my ways around.  Now I wish I had hoarded just a little longer because I need a whole new wardrobe, but I wouldn’t change how far I have come. I still can’t believe I have stuck with it this long. I still have just as much motivation and determination as I did when I started this whole thing in May. I still really feel it this time around. Something is different this time, I have a whole new outlook on my life style. Knowing my limits are endless and my progress will go as far as I take it makes me excited and scared all at the same time. I am so proud of myself it brings a tear to my eye and my only hope is that someone struggling with weight loss can have the epiphany I had and turn their world around.  I am so pissed I let myself miss out on so much my whole life, all for food.

I only intended this post to be about my new bed but I got a little mushy there for a second.  My reason for blogging is to track my progress and inspire others. I only hope I can help someone feeling as lost and helpless as I used to feel.

Off to my new bed, I will let you know how she feels!